Sunday, August 28, 2005

Durnken Dunning

Thats all that needs to be said isnt it? Now. I know i said that i would stick to one pariticular topic when next i do a durnken dunning. But im just not feeling any of those topic tonight. I mean I was going to rag on shawn penn. God I hate him. Dont get me wrong, the movie was good and all, but i just cant stand his acting. I dont know why but i cant.
It should be also noted that im not sure what "game i am bringing tonight" it could be A it could be a B- perhaps even a c+ but lets watch it all unfold in due corse.
So today we went and did a maze in maple ridge and graham felt the wrath of mother nature in the petting zoo. It was better than i excpect. really it was.
On to other things that i dont understand. You know what i dont understand. 19.5. I was watching some conspiracy series today and they said that all planets in our solar system has some blip in them at the point of north 19.5. Why is this signifigant? I mean who cares that its 19.5? There are things such as coincidences. Not everything has to be a mass conspiracy which the government is covering up. Really why would the goverment cover up anything? Fucking aliens. If their so intellegent why are they coming here? Or are we that arrogent to think that were that intresting? and more to the point why the hell am i talking about this shit?
Oh yeah. Im durnk. So i think this post needs some poetry. Or better yet. Some hikus so here we go. Lets see if you can guess who they are.

A big brain he has
desetined for greatness for sure
poco eat his dust

a big jerk he is
but you still got to love him
oh how i hate him

leaps and bounds above the rest
number one in line. nuff said.
twenty five miles.

titties a plenty
he sleep and eat more than you
the competent one

love something please man
other than scarlett johanson
one drink minimum

Thats all i can think of off the top of my head. I hope you enjoyed them. Anyway what were we talking about again? I've completly forgotten. You know whats strange? No neither do I. I was just asking. Someone ought to though. I mean come on. What shall we discuss. I really have nothing to talk about these days. sorry i had to take a drink. You wouldnt have noticed one way or another but i figured i must tell you.

And now the bottom five of working in and around a gas station.
1. PrePay! Read the fucking signs you douche bags! if i could Id slap you!
2. Having someone dump a bunch of change on my counter and saying count it
3. Having to stolk the back up of pop after some took a massive shit
4. The constant noises. I hate technology
5. Smokes. I hope they all give you cancer!

Huzzah! now that ive got that off my chest. Id like to discuss the market place. Whats wrong with the market place these days? I mean cmon take a look at it! fluctuations, high prices. I say sell sell sell. Get out now while you still can! think about the kids god damn you! THINK ABOUT THE KIDS!!!!!!
For some reason rock you like a hurricane just popped into my head.
80s music is awesome by the way. You know i think the next time i get drunk i think i'll have to go to a karoke bar. I wanna sing some Journey. Dont fucking talk shit about Journey!
Perhaps if I was sober enough id post the pics of what happened tonight but im not. So tough jimmys! Speaking of. I wonder what Jimmy is doign right now? Baning chicks in western no doubt. Hopefully chicks.
Now I shall list off animals i dont like: Chickens. Racoons. Masquitos. Goats. Goldfish. Snakes. Spiders
Animals I like: Monkeys. That is all.
If someone was able to get me a monkey. Id be forever greatful. Dinning or Rich anyway you can swing that for me? Maybe i could get a helper monkey and teach it to freebase. I know some of you think thats cruel, but i think thats funny. What can i say im cold. So much like us.
Man I cant belive i have to go back to sfu in a week. Im kinda looking forward to it which is bizzare in itsself. Speaking of bizzare, i wonder bizzaro dunning is up to. I also wonder what i would be like in an alternate reality? My guess is horrible wordrobe, tones of women and rich beyond my wildest dreams.
Even though if you really think of it. Money is the most useless human invention of all time. I wish we were still on a barganing system. all i can say is one word. Beads. And on a final note. chicken chicken chicken. Ask graham.

Current Music: Journey-open arms, Journey- Dont stop beliveing
Current Comic: Cat Women When in rome-by Jeph Loeb and Tim Sale
Current Durnken Grade: C+

5 Comments:

Blogger Dickolas Wang said...

Well I don't know about you guys, but I give this one at least an A.

2:09 AM

 
Blogger ___________ said...

Top five quotes of Dunningjam 2K5: (all courtesy of MJD)

5. "There are 54 decks in the game."

4. "He has no appendable thumbs! How can he beat off?"

3. Dunning describes his date rape technique:

"Here...take some of this, then follow me into my bedroom and I'll have my way with you. Uh oh! Felony!"

2. "What are you, some kind of heterosexual?"

1. Dunning's Zimbabwean poem:

"Twelve chickens in the field
cluck, cluck, cluck
chop, chicken, chop
dead chicken
eat tomorrow"

3:00 AM

 
Blogger jim said...

Thanks for the compliment, Dunning. In order to reciprocate, not only will I find you a helper monkey, I will find you one that already knows how to freebase.

7:28 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You can't see it, but I'm giving a standing ovation.


--VG

9:29 AM

 
Blogger jim said...

Rose early this morn
Durnken yarns did await me
Bless Captain Morgan

10:17 PM

 

Post a Comment

<< Home